Journal · Philosophy
Fear Speaks Louder Than Faith
On the fear of starting too late, the worship of achievement, and what a drum in your hands can give you that your mind never will.
Every invitation to begin arrives with a list of reasons to ignore it. Choosing which voice to follow is the first real work.
Fear speaks louder than faith. It is more creative, handing you the list of things that could go wrong. It knows all the reasons why you should never try realizing your dreams. “You’re too old.” “You are not talented enough.” “It’s a waste of time.” “You won’t earn enough income.” And many more.
Faith, on the other hand, is often more subtle. It demands connecting to a quiet intuition. It asks you to see and act through the loud thoughts projected by the filter of fear. It asks you to look fear in its eyes, recognize it, and decide that it is not the governor.
That action by itself is very difficult, but so important. It demands, firstly, self awareness. It demands suspicion of one’s own mind. Recognizing that there is a fear of failure generating reasons why you should never try to fulfill your dream. You stop identifying with every content your mind creates, and you start choosing your path.
Fear of starting too late, or about your level of talent, is very common. What is the reasoning behind it? You’re too old to start if you want to become a professional, or just very good. Same for the talent fear. You’re not talented enough to become very good, or to be even worthy of playing music. I know these fears intimately.
Yes, a person starting to play a musical instrument in his 70s probably won’t become a professional. But why has becoming a professional, or just “very good,” become the only worthy goal? What about enjoyment? What about quality of life?
We are obsessed with achieving, and we underestimate experiencing. It doesn’t matter what I feel when playing, the only thing that counts is whether I will become amazing or not. Which really means whether I will become worthy through the filter of my musical abilities.
We are obsessed with achieving, and we underestimate experiencing.
It is so reflective of our general approach these days. But it is not the only one. There are cultures where music is firstly and most importantly a social and emotional thing. Often happiness and celebration, but not only. Music has a power on us humans. It moves things inside of us. You can play very simply and be connected very deeply.
The thought to learn to play an instrument is never sourced in the brain, through the “what can I achieve” filter. It comes from an opening. A spark inside you that calls you to engage with music, to be part of it more than just listening. It is an invitation made by the parts of ourselves we sadly tend to neglect and underestimate. If it doesn’t produce money, physical health, or respect from the surroundings, it’s a luxury and it’s not relevant. But it is so relevant.
Choosing to follow a calling, to start walking on the path of a dream, is to rebel against the achieving mode and to open our arms to the experiencing mode.
Does that mean we can strip off our egos and our ambitions? Not at all. Our mind is very strong and creative. It doesn’t rest. Thoughts about why you should never start could transform into thoughts about the reasons starting was a mistake and why you should stop. But a drum in your hands can become a vehicle that pulls you away from your mind and into the present. Dancing with music, feeling a groove and a pulse, often gives you an undeniable experience. An experience that your mind can never give.
So next time life sparks an invitation inside you to go on a path, consider it. Consider walking into the unknown and letting life unfold your story.
There are so many people lying on their death beds regretting never giving themselves the chance of dancing with a dream.
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